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Unread 09-05-2009   #1 (permalink)
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Unhappy Possible abuse? Need advice

My roommate and I haven't been getting along the past couple days. She's only been living her for a little over a month, and she told me yesterday that she hates my cats. My cats started acting strange yesterday after I got home from work, and I'm wondering if maybe she's abusing them when I'm not home.

Serena has always been very timid ever since I adopted her in March. She would stay hidden all the time, and sometimes I forgot I had a cat because she would be under the dining room table on a chair, under the couches, under my bed, etc. It wasn't until I got Toby in June that she started coming out of her hiding places. She discovered my aquarium and would always try to get my guppies. The cats would chase each other around the apartment (unfortunately, doing so, they would knock everything onto the floor in their path), play with each other on the cat tree, she would even let me pet her and hold her (she wouldn't let me anywhere near her before). Toby has been playful and lovable since the day he was born (he was my sisters kitten and she gave him to me). He isn't shy, and as soon as someone walks in the door and sits on the couch, he's jumping on them, rubbing up against them, and loving them.

When I got home from work yesterday, when I walked in the door they took off running (Normally, I'm greeted by Toby). I walked towards them to pet them and they ran from me. As soon as I opened my bedroom door, they darted under the bed and they haven't been out since, except to come out to the kitchen for food and water (I've only seen Toby come out, I haven't seen Serena come out yet). Toby knows his name, and normally when I call his name he comes running and jumps on my lap. Even Serena started coming to me and meowing when I called her "Baby Girl." Neither of them have been responding to me. I try to talk to them in a soothing voice, trying to lure them from under my bed and they just back up even further away from me.

I was wondering if anyone knows anything about behavior and why they're being like this. Do you think something happened to them yesterday when I was at work? Like I said, my roommate told me yesterday that she hates my cats (I don't know how, Toby is lovable, and Serena keeps to herself), and I'm wondering if anyone else thinks she did something. I asked her, and she said she didn't (I don't know anyone that would really admit to hurting their roommate's pets).

Any advice?
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Unread 09-05-2009   #2 (permalink)
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Tell the roommate it's not working out and ask her to leave. Your cats are more important

Yes, I think she is hurtingabusing them when you are not there.

Until she goes, get a lock on your bedroom door and lock your cats in there when you are not there to protect them.
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Unread 09-05-2009   #3 (permalink)
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I hope Nicole takes your advice Gail.

Show your roommate the door love. xxxxx
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Unread 09-05-2009   #4 (permalink)
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I agree, get a good sturdy lock for your bedroom door, and lock your cats in the room while you are gone (if you can't ditch the roommate) If you can get your roommate to leave, you can look for another, one that loves cats!
It does sound to me like your roommate did do something to your cats, being as the cats are now scared.
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Unread 09-05-2009   #5 (permalink)
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Nicole, I'm sorry but it does sound as if something has happened which has made them scared, I can't think of any other reason for their behaviour to change so suddenly.
I'd follow the advice others have posted and keep them in your room while you're not there to keep an eye on things.
Can you ask your room mate to leave? I know I wouldn't want to share a home with someone capable of being cruel to my beloved cats, or any animal for that matter.
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Unread 09-10-2009   #6 (permalink)
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OMG my blood went cold after reading this. Like everyone else I feel strongly that you need to lock your furkids in your room until you can get rid of this person. Hopefully you will be able to get them to trust you again and go back to the way they were before this happened. My sister scared Zipper out of her tree a long time ago when Zipper jumped up on the kitchen counter when we were having a family get together and my sister screamed because it shocked her and now Zipper runs whenever we move a plastic bag. (Not sure why this frightens Zipper.) I would imagine that something happened on more then one occasion for them to be acting this way.
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Unread 09-12-2009   #7 (permalink)
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yes like everyone says, lock them in the bedroom and ask her to leave!
i feel sick after reading that.
poor little kitties
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Unread 09-29-2009   #8 (permalink)
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I completely agree with acerlt and everyone else, roomates can be easily replaced, but not your babies. It is absurd for anyone to "hate" anything, hate is a strong word, and you should be cautioned....if you cant get the roommate out because of any kind of agreements, (since i know here in NY you need a months notice before anyone has the right to leave)
And a month IS A LONG time, make sure you get one of those hidden cameras, you can buy them at ebay some are like 30-50 dollars, and put them in an open area so that u can see what happens when ur not there, and if by chance u do see something out of place then lock your cats in ur bedroom AND use the evidence as proof to make her leave!
One of my friends cats has been abused by her boyfriend without her knowledge while she was at work and the cat became soo stressed and angry that it took months of patiance and care to get her calm again...sadly even now, the sight of any MAN gets the cat to hiss and scratch him!
Good luck <3
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Last edited by Caki_Nanu; 09-29-2009 at 12:50 AM.
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Unread 10-15-2009   #9 (permalink)
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My advice would be to read your own post-the clues are all there. You have timid cats who start to respond to you, You have a cat hating roomate. your cats are nervous again.A cat will sense when theyre not liked & depending on the cats confidence, will act accordingly.
I am a home checker for the UK Cats Protection & unfortunately, we get a lot of abused cats & kittens(I have 2).
You need to get rid of your roomate if poss, but the main thing is to get the cats confidence back. I think you may have to go back to the beginning depending on what level of damage your roomate has done.Give them lots of fuss if theyl let you. Eventually they will be as friendly as before. Good luck.
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Unread 10-18-2009   #10 (permalink)
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I do hope that you have resolved this by now, and have gotten rid of your roommate, and you babies are happy again!
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