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Unread 12-23-2008   #1 (permalink)
kara_leigh
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Nora seems very upset about Milo not being here. As soon as I got back from the vet I saw her looking around and meowing REALLY loud, like she was trying to find him. She was extremely clingy all night long and just meowing loudly all night. I told my husband that she seemed sad and worried, but he insisted that cats don't have feelings like that. I feel so bad for her.

Would getting her a new friend help, or should I wait a while? It would be at least a couple weeks before we would even consider it, but I thought I'd ask. Not only just for her benefit, but after losing two cats in a matter of a couple months, I think my son would benefit from it also.

Is there anything at all that I can do for her??
 
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Unread 12-23-2008   #2 (permalink)
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Hi Kara,

You can do nothing for her now. She probably will forget about Milo in a couple of days or so & tell you hubby it's not true they don't realize, they
do realize. When each one of my 2 kits died, one in 2003 & the second one in 2005, the rest of the gang were like Nora now, in exactly the same situation. Two days later they forgot.
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Unread 12-27-2008   #3 (permalink)
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Kara,

Again I apologize for not being here on the board sooner to help you get through this terrible time.

Hannah has been gone two weeks and a day. Dynah still walks the halls meowing and looking for her. They were very close, and Dynah is not close with the other cats, although she is trying.

Yes, they do have those feelings. Probably the worst time I experienced this is when I lost my cat DI-Burger to cancer. Burger had given me four beautiful kittens, two of which stayed with me. One died before she did, and strangely she wasn't affected. When Burger died, her remaining daughter Cali, was devastated. She cried constantly and became a permanent fixture on my lap whenever it was available. What made this so noticeable was that before her Mom cat's death, Cali was a nasty girl! She was not much into people, and would hiss and growl when you tried to pet her. After Burger died, she was a most affectionate cat!! So yes, they DO have those feelings.

I think another cat would be a good idea. You will know when the time is right. I was seriously considering a kitten, since the last kitten I had in the house was Hannah. I am waiting awhile though, and will post in this forum later as to what is delaying my decision.

Take care Kara.
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Unread 01-01-2009   #4 (permalink)
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Default Cats do grieve

Quote:
Originally Posted by kara_leigh View Post
Nora seems very upset about Milo not being here. As soon as I got back from the vet I saw her looking around and meowing REALLY loud, like she was trying to find him. She was extremely clingy all night long and just meowing loudly all night. I told my husband that she seemed sad and worried, but he insisted that cats don't have feelings like that. I feel so bad for her.

Would getting her a new friend help, or should I wait a while? It would be at least a couple weeks before we would even consider it, but I thought I'd ask. Not only just for her benefit, but after losing two cats in a matter of a couple months, I think my son would benefit from it also.

Is there anything at all that I can do for her??
Cats do grieve.

My Sweet Pea lost his beloved Bibbs (rb 3/05) almost four years ago.Two days after she left us for the Bridge, he went into a decline, hid away, refused to eat, I was afraid I was going to lose him too. After three weeks of this I finally took him to the vet, which seemed to break the thrall of his grief.

however he continued to look for her and call for her for many months. It took him a full year to almost completely recover, he's better now, happy and cheerful, but he lost a bit of sparkle that never came back.

And now....when I leave with a cat in a carrier, he is at the door waiting for us when I come back. He goes frantic if I have to leave a cat at the vet for whatever reason, and come home empty handed. runs all over the house looking and calling. All this almost four years after losing his Bibbs

So now, if I have to leave a cat for a dental or whatever, I don't come home until I've picked the kitty up.

I have an elderly cat who is living on quality of life now. Meaning everything that can be done has been done for her, it's only a matter of her telling me when she's had enough. This cat is the other of the two who raised my Sweet Pea. I am very concerned over how he will cope when she is ready to go.

I've made some plans based on what happened last time. I have a feliway plug in already (used it with my last integration) and I got some rescue remedy. My vet will come here to administer the final kindness so he can say goodbye, will see her and know she is gone.

I'm hoping if he sees her leave us he won't look for her. Yes I think he will still grieve terribly, but maybe he won't look and call for her. that is the most heart breaking thing.

I'm very sorry for the loss of your beloved Milo. And I am always in favor of bringing in another cat. Even if Nora doesn't like the newbie right away it will give her something else to think about.
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Unread 01-05-2009   #5 (permalink)
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Cats do grieve. Just like we do. And it can last months. I've seen animals starve themselves because of a lost companion. Getting a friend is a good way to make her not feel as alone anymore. They miss them too.They have feelings too. And souls.

My husbands family and i got into an arguement once because they don't belive animals have souls. They each have a different personality- and you can only have that, if you have a soul.

Cuddle your kitten, make her know she's not alone. And def. get another cat. It will help her take her mind off things. but that doesn't mean her relationship will be the same with the new one.
 
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Unread 01-06-2009   #6 (permalink)
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I'm not so sure. When my two angels passed (in 2003 & 2005) the others
were looking for them the foll. day & the next they totally forgot...
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Unread 01-06-2009   #7 (permalink)
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Yes cats do greive and Zipper still looks for Oscar and is very clingy with me. Oscar has been gone only a month now. She has started to want more attention from dh these days. She always slept with me but she wants to sleep between dh and myself and has to touch some part of both of us.
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