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Unread 09-29-2006   #1 (permalink)
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Default Cat and Mouse: Mind Games With a Serial Killer

Customer Review: hideous bilge
Hack screenwriter Brian Lane tries to capitalize on his being a serial killer's lawyer with this mess of a publication, a witch's brew of foul ingredients: multiple murderer/mutilator William Suff's own pathetic fiction, Lane's wimpy justifications of his own unfortunate past, and believe it or not: a cookbook by Suff ! Includes sickening photos of Suff's victims, and ludricrous alibis for the very unphotogenic Suff.
Customer Review: Amateurish and Self-Absorbed
Where to start with this whiff of literary effluvia? The first thing you'll notice are the disturbingly gruesome pictures. That's no mistake. The author must have gone through every police file available to get the nastiest, most shocking shots he could. He HAD to, otherwise he would never have sold a single copy of this...book. The pictures are there to distract you from the author's endless, boring stories about HIMSELF. I'd say a quarter of this book is about the life and crimes of Bill Suff, and the rest is a vainglorious autobiography of the author himself: An uplifting tale of a nerdy boy who grew into a rabbity man, overcoming obstacles such as car accidents and invisibility to pretty girls until he eventually found his calling as a writer for Matlock and Hunter. WHO CARES? Shut up already! The inclusion of Bill Suff's cookbook and his idiotic writings (a lame ghost story and a tale about a gentle soul who's been wrongly imprisoned - talk about someone who watches too much tv) are there for the same reason as the pictures. The novelty of a serial killer cookbook will sell more copies. The irony is that the author praises these writings as unusually professional - like he would know what that looks like! But he's got a point. Compared to his own, they really are. Another thing that bothers me is the "Novelization" of the murders. Apparently, the author can read the thoughts of the victims and detail how they tried to bargain with their killer, despite the fact that they never lived to tell what they had been thinking that day, and their killer isn't about to tell anyone what they said either. How does the author know that Suff licked a victim and thought she tasted "sweet"? How does he know that the victim, a prostitute, had been happy that all her customers were easy to please that day? It's all just speculation. The thing about Suff putting a body part into his award-winning chili for the cookoff is speculation too. There's no proof, just innuendo that might sell more copies. This is a really boring book. You can skip page after page and not miss a thing. Brian Alan Lane should go back to writing unmemorable episodes of barely memorable tv shows and leave the real writing to someone can pay attention to the subject.


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